I hate “About Me” pages. How do you sum up your life in less than a page? Because let’s face it, if an “About Me” page was an entire page, you’d seem pretty pretentious. And the idea of summing up your life on an “About Me” page for an online journal seems a bit redundant. Isn’t the journal “About Me”? Plus, you have to make sure to stay away from non-static facts, like how old you are and junk like that.

Ok, so I’m 34. Oops...that’s probably going to change which means I’ll have to come back and update this at least once a year. Great...now I have a “to-do” list.

The most important thing to know “About Me” is that I’m long winded. I need to take a class or something that teaches you how to say what you need to say in a clear and concise manner...not in 10,000 words. My “to-do” list just got longer...

Anyway...I’m married. My husband and I got married in 2005 but we’ve been together since 1998. I guess in addition to being long winded and addle-brained, I’m also not a very good manipulator. The average woman would have been able to lasso her husband in less than half a decade. I have no children of my own but my husband was kind enough to provide me with 2 step-kids, both boys, and they are really terrific kids. We live in an apartment and it’s finally an apartment that I actually like. We have 2 cats, Tabby and Gizmo (we call her Giz or Gizzy though, even when we yell at her) and they are mostly good, except when they are getting into things (which is often) or in heat (which is all the fucking time).

I also underwent Gastric Bypass Surgery (or wls for short, you’ll see me refer to it that way a lot) in October of 2005 and as of this writing (April 28, 2006) I’ve lost 125 pounds. My husband designed this blog because I’m an idiot when it comes to all things net-tech related but if I do say so myself, I’m fucking phenomenal when it comes to graphics and putting them together in what I consider to be aesthetically pleasing ways. I think I’m quirky but in a good way. I’m opinionated and I’m a drama whore. I love drama, even when it involves me. I like to argue with people because most people who will argue online are complete idiots and I love to point that out to whoever may be watching. I also don’t mind starting shit and will do it on a somewhat regular basis.

I’ve been doing the blogging thing since 2000, long before there were Blog Explosions, Blog Rings, Blog Rolls, My Spaces and any of the other “flavor of the month” crap that’s come out to ride the coattails of this latest in social distortion bandwagons that the internet seems to propagate. So I hope you read, I hope you enjoy, I hope you come back, and I hope you whore me out on your own attempt at anonymous creativity (that would be your blog).

“Jesus, you typin’ a novel over there or what??”<--My husband’s response to this “document”. Told you I was long winded...guess this entire page makes me pretentious too.

04/28/2006